If Only
by foreverandsevendays
Summary: Tyzula Week 2016: This isn't how they imagined their life together would be, but maybe it's better than what they once had in mind.


IF ONLY

* * *

001\. Trouble

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Azula was in trouble with the law, but it wasn't her fault. Both she and Ty Lee were certain of that, and so it made sense to break her out of prison. Ty Lee wanted nothing more than to repair their romance, and this was the opportunity of a lifetime.

"You don't have to thank me," said Ty Lee as they hid behind a tree in the woods. No one was pursuing them, but it was a decent safety measure.

"I was not planning on it," Azula replied, smirking.

Ty Lee stared at her, studying the woman lit up by the moonlight. She was everything Ty Lee wanted, or so Ty Lee thought.

"We need to get you out of those clothes," Ty Lee said, tugging at what amounted to rags. "You're way too pretty to wear this. And way too innocent to wear it either."

Azula would not call herself _innocent_ , but she would not call herself a _war criminal_ either.

"Do you have any options?" Azula asked, cocking an eyebrow.

"I want to take you to my aunt's house up in the mountains. She doesn't live there anymore and I think it's perfect for us." Ty Lee smiled. Azula could not help but feel a bit of that joy, but it registered as wrong in her body and therefore quickly faded.

Azula thought about kissing Ty Lee but changed her mind. Any chance of love died years ago at the Boiling Rock.

If only, if only, Azula knew why Ty Lee chose to do this.

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002\. Wild

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"This might as well be camping," Azula said haughtily. She stepped into this home expecting some level of glamor and class but instead found a floor coated with dirt, overgrown plants, broken furniture and chipped paint. "I hate camping."

Ty Lee shut the door behind them and it made a loud, angry shrieking noise.

"I love the wilderness," Ty Lee said, trying to lighten the situation. It did not work on either of them. "I really think I hate this place though."

"Start cleaning," Azula said, sitting down on the cleanest surface she could find. "I am _not_ sleeping in the dirt. My cell was a luxurious palace compared to this place."

Ty Lee did as Azula ordered.

If only, if only, Azula would see just how much this showed Ty Lee's devotion.

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003\. Kittens

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While Ty Lee cleaned the garden, she found a surprise waiting for her in the weeds.

Kittens! She could not believe her luck as she lay down and gazed at their big, eager eyes. When she looked further, she saw that they were starving to death, and she ran inside to get a basket. It was dirty and cracked, but it was good enough to scoop the kittens into and carry them inside.

It was warmer in here—the mountain air was frigid—and Ty Lee knew she could find some sort of food for them. She did what she could and they had some form of meal, even if it was not perfect.

Azula walked in while the kittens were greedily eating.

"What are _those_?" Azula demanded.

"Kittens," Ty Lee said.

"I know they are kittens, but _why_ are kittens in my house?" Azula asked.

One of them leapt down and rubbed against Azula's leg.

It was true love.

If only, if only, it were that easy for Ty Lee.

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004\. Mountains

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"I hate living here! I hate living here and I would rather be _executed_!" Azula screamed, running an arm across the table and knocking everything on it to the floor with a clamor. Ty Lee flinched, which Azula saw, which only made Azula angrier.

"I know," Ty Lee squeaked softly, trying to come up with the words to say. She did not know them. "I know, but I wanted to save you. I wanted to have a life with you. I'm…"

"Remarkably selfish," snarled Azula, clenching her fists. They were smoking. Ty Lee genuinely hoped she would not be electrocuted tonight.

"It's cleaner," said Ty Lee, stepping towards the window. "And look at the stars. They're amazing from up here. The air is really fresh too and I'm making progress with the decorating. And you're so good at hunting for food!"

Ty Lee gestured at the sky and Azula walked—albeit huffily—to gaze out of it.

The sky was impressive. Azula looked at it like it was the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.

If only, if only, she would look at Ty Lee like that.

.

005\. Wishes

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"The dandelions are so big up here!" Ty Lee gleefully exclaimed, kneeling to study one. It was _huge_ compared to those in Caldera or on Kyoshi Island. Not much grew in either of those places, to tell the truth. One was a sprawling city and the other was hostile to most foliage.

"So?" Azula looked as unimpressed as ever.

"Wishes must be so much bigger and better." Ty Lee smiled at the plant. Azula did not understand how it could bring the woman such joy.

"So, make a wish," Azula ordered.

Ty Lee did. _I wish you would love me like I love you._

She opened her eyes and plucked the flower, blowing the thousand little white petals into the wind. Azula watched, looming over Ty Lee.

"So," asked Azula, "what did you wish for?"

Ty Lee blushed. "I can't tell you, princess. Then it won't come true."

"That's a ridiculous rule," Azula said, crossing her arms and rolling her eyes, her lips upturned scathingly. "I hate secrets. Well, I don't mind my own, but I hate it when you keep secrets from me."

"Then…" Ty Lee whispered, "you won't mind if I do this?"

Ty Lee stood, stepped forward and pressed her lips against Azula's before the princess could react. Expecting retaliation, Ty Lee began to step back, but Azula grabbed her and pulled her into a deeper one.

They broke apart and stared at each other for some time.

"I'm sorry," Ty Lee said, knowing it was what Azula wanted to hear.

"I forgive you," the princess said, knowing it was what Ty Lee expected to hear.

If only, if only, they could tell each other the truth.

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006\. Unplanned

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Ty Lee decided to throw a party.

Azula turned it down, saying she did not have enough time to plan for it.

If only, if only, Azula knew that was the point of it all.

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007\. Candles

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"Candles are sexy, aren't they?" Ty Lee said. She reconsidered her words as soon as she set them free, but could not take them back.

She and Azula sat among the collection of candles they had built over the past months together. It was sensual, to say the least, and usually the two women tried to ignore that.

"They are," Azula said.

Both women sat in silence for some time after that.

Then Azula kissed Ty Lee and tugged at her clothes and it escalated from there.

If only, if only, they had done this sooner.

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008\. Under the Milky Way

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"Why are you lying down in the dirt?" Azula asked, abruptly obscuring Ty Lee's vision.

"I'm stargazing," Ty Lee said.

Azula eyed her with disdain, then, surprisingly, lied down beside her. Flat on her back, she looked up and saw the brilliant stars above, and the shreds of the milky way. She stared at them with a cold fascination, the same way she stared at Ty Lee from time to time.

To a woman not used to the heavens, it was peculiar and shimmering ahead of her like a vision from a dream.

"It isn't bad," Azula said, which was high praise. "Do you do this often?"

"Every night. I can't sleep really," said Ty Lee. "I guess you can't sleep either. I hear you sometimes when you wake up screaming."

"Are you looking for something up there?" Azula asked.

"Not really. I'm too busy looking for something down here," Ty Lee replied. She felt nervous now.

"And that would be?"

"Looking for what you're looking for," Ty Lee said. She sat up now, feeling colder than she was before. "I wish I knew."

Azula sat up too. "You want to know if I'm interested in you romantically, huh?"

Ty Lee nodded, averting her eyes.

"I'm sorry I dragged you up here to the mountains. It was… it isn't how I imagined our life would go," Ty Lee whispered.

"I didn't imagine my life like this either," Azula said. She paused. " _But_ , I think I would have if I knew what I would find."

They did not kiss; they did not need to.

Ty Lee had her answer.

They were in love, and there were no more 'if only's.


End file.
